Andy
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Andy 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 1 0 年前

proofreading 英文文章

煩請幫忙 proofreading 這篇英文. 謝謝你.

On the day after Christmas, I turned on TV to expect department stores promoting top-quality goods with deep discount price here in America. Unexpectedly, it was the news of tsunami disaster from South Asia; the disaster-affected area includes countries as Thailand, Indonesia, Malaysia, India, Sri Lanka, etc.

There was a horrible sense from news on the island of Phuket in Thailand. While many tourists enjoyed intoxicated scenery under coco tree on the golden sandy beach, the terrifying waves suddenly raised pushing inland. Houses collapsed in a flash. Corpses were all over the fields. Survivors who escaped the death had lost their home, living in hunger and cold. Thailand, Indonesia, Malaysia, Sri Lanka and other countries are even especially more catastrophe. The number of casualties continues to rise. I was shock with great sadness and sorrow.

As Tzu Chi people, nothing is more urgent than emergency rescue. I decided to cancel my holiday shopping and wrote a check dedicated for tsunami disaster to Tzu Chi Seattle branch. The amount may not be much. With combining donation from Tzu Chi people around the world, it will be able to bring relief and help to people in disaster area.

The day after tsunami disaster, I received a call from dhama brother Wei-Jin and sangha sister Lu-Qi. Seattle branch started the preparation of street fundraising. A group of seven included sangha sister Lu-Qi and I were responsible at 99 Ranch market in Edmonds, Washington. Before the fundraising, sangha sister Lu-Qi reminded us to thank everyone who donated and to treat everyone equally, no matter how much they contributed. The most important of all is the sincerity of their contribution.

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  • 1 0 年前
    最佳解答

    錯誤不多,一點點而已

    On the day after Christmas, I turned on TV to expect department stores promoting top-quality goods with LOW discount price here in America. Unexpectedly, it was the news of THE tsunami disaster IN South Asia; the disaster-affected areaS includeD countries SUCH as Thailand, Indonesia, Malaysia, India, Sri Lanka, etc.

    There was a horrible sense(妳想說感覺嗎?) from news on the island of Phuket in Thailand.

    這段改成:The island of Phuket in Thailand looked horrible from the news images.(從新聞的圖片看起來很慘)

    While many tourists enjoyed intoxicated scenery under cocoNUT trees on the golden sand beachES, the terrifying waves suddenly raised AND pushED inland. Houses collapsed in a flash. Corpses were all over the fields. Survivors who escaped death had lost their home AND ARE living in hunger and cold. Thailand, Indonesia, Malaysia, Sri Lanka and other countries (不需要especially)were even more catastrophIC. The number of casualties continues to rise. I was shockED with great sadness and sorrow.

    As Tzu Chi people, nothing is more urgent than emergency rescue. I decided to cancel my holiday shopping and wrote a check dedicated for THE tsunami disaster to Tzu Chi Seattle branch. The amount may not be much. BY combining donationS from Tzu Chi people around the world, it will be able to bring relief and help to people in THE disaster area.

    The day after THE tsunami disaster, I received a call from dhama brother Wei-Jin and sangha sister Lu-Qi. Seattle branch started the preparation of street fundraising. A group of seven included sangha sister Lu-Qi and I were responsible at 99 Ranch market in Edmonds, Washington. Before the fundraising, sangha sister Lu-Qi reminded us to thank everyone who donated and to treat everyone equally, no matter how much they contributed. The sincerity of their contribution was most important.(順序錯了,那樣是ok可是聽的人會覺得蠻奇怪的)

    參考資料: 我,有問題再補充喔
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  • 4 年前

    學校外語中心一般都有提供免費的潤稿服務,可以問看看!

    文章才275字,其實很少,可以使用外面潤稿公司的服務喔!

    推薦給您我使用的wordvice潤稿服務,我自己在國外讀書工作,

    很常需要這種英文潤稿proofreading服務,

    回件快又便宜,重點是品質很ok,你參考看看!

    http://wordvice.com.tw/

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