promotion image of download ymail app
Promoted
勇者傳說 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 1 0 年前

急~~~急急急急急, 幫我確認文法問題!!(爆炸的20點)

Health is more important than wealth.We have to attend our body.We can\'t ignore any signal.Everyday walks 30 minutes, and eats 5 different fruits and vegetables.Take enough sleep.Nothing is important than health.Health is our treasure, do not lose it. 如果可以的話順便在幫門多家個幾點嘿嘿,感激不盡喔

2 個解答

評分
  • 1 0 年前
    最佳解答

         Health is the No. 1 Treasure in Our LivesHealth is absolutely more important than anything else in the world.Even if you earn the whole world, you get nothing if you lose your health. We have to pay full attention to our bodies.  We can't afford to ignore any warning signals arising from our physical systems.  There is a proverb saying "An apple a day keeps the doctor away".  For the purpose of maintaining our health, we ought to eat at least 5 different kinds of fruits and vegetables and go jogging for 30 minutes or more everyday.  Besides, enough and sound sleep is indispensible for our fitness, too.Health is always by far more imperative than wealth, to say nothing of time, money, fame, and so on.  It is our paramount treasure to be placed in the top priority throughout our lives.  Not until most people lose health do they realize how important health is. I sincerely hope that we don't belong to "most people"!   

    2006-05-15 11:33:03 補充:

    在"賺到了全世界卻賠上了健康"那一行, 也就是從標題開始起算的第三行 "........ ,you get nothing if you lose your health"改成 "...... ,you get nothing as long as you lose your health", 語氣會更加生動, 也增加說服力.

    2006-05-15 13:10:18 補充:

    建議大家各自發揮,似無須踩在別人頭上,只有自己比較好, 何況: 我用in the world會比in this world 差嗎? 我用warning signals 會比warning signs差嗎? 我用physical systems(生理系統) 會比bodies 差嗎? 我用proverb 會比saying 差嗎? 我用maintain our health 會比maintain a healthy body 差嗎 ? 我用Besides, 會比Besides that, 差嗎? 我用our lives 會比our life差嗎?生命是可數名詞.

    2006-05-15 13:23:01 補充:

    我用PARAMOUNT, IMPERATIVE與IMPORTANT交相替代, 會比從頭到尾一直用IMPORTANT差嗎? 類似"賠上健康等於失去一切"的真理, 用現在式不可嗎? 我用"健康重於財富, 遑論時光, 名與利等等(身外物)"的句型,會比較差嗎? 我用INDISPENSIBLE(不可或缺的)會比ESSENTIAL差嗎?

    2006-05-15 13:34:50 補充:

    我替版主加了一個標題: "健康是我們生命中至高無上的寶藏", 生命是可數名詞, 用LIVES才是正確的. 警訊常用的是WARNING SIGNALS 而非WARNING SIGNS.

    2006-05-16 10:57:12 補充:

    最後一句是"大多數人都在失去健康時,才體認到健康的可貴.我懇切盼望,我們不會成為大多數人裡的一員." 這是倒裝句法且帶有幽默韻味的結尾, 絕對比" We should not..., but Ving..."的句型精采而不落俗套.最後一段time,money,fame,請改成time,love,fame, 使健康與名利身外物的對比更鮮明.

    參考資料: 我曾旅美N年
    • Commenter avatar登入以對解答發表意見
  • 1 0 年前

    如果你要短短的作文

    修改如下

    Health has always been more important than wealth. Therefore we need to take good care of our body. We should not ignore any signs from our body. By taking enough sleep, eating five different kinds of fruits and vegetables, and walking thirty minutes a day, we will be healthier. Nothing is more important than health, because it is our greatest treasure, and make sure you don’t lose it!

    不然的話這幾句要修一下

    (Health is more important than wealth.)

    沒問題

    (We have to attend our body.)

    We should attend to our body.

    OR

    We need to (should)take care of our body.

    (We can't ignore any signal.)

    We shouldn't ignore any signs from our body.

    (Everyday walks 30 minutes, and eats 5 different fruits and vegetables.) 這一句有點直接中翻英

    Walking thirty minutes and eating five different kinds of fruits and vegetables every day.

    Take enough sleep.

    (Nothing is important than health.)

    Nothing is more important than health.

    (Health is our treasure, do not lose it. )

    Health is our greatest treasure, do not lose it.

    OR

    Health is worthless, don't lose it!

    2006-05-15 00:11:26 補充:

    天涯之星 寫的很不錯不過我有稍加修飾 裡面有一些小文法和用字問題

    2006-05-15 00:12:37 補充:

    Health is absolutely more important than anything else in this world. Even if you earned the whole world, you'd end up with nothing if you lost your health. Therefore we should take good care of our bodies.

    2006-05-15 00:13:59 補充:

    We cannot afford to ignore warning signs from our bodies, or serious consequences may follow.

    2006-05-15 00:14:46 補充:

    There is a saying which goes “An apple a day keeps the doctor away,” and that is the exact reason to eat five different kinds of fruits and vegetables, and walking at least thirty minutes every day to maintain a healthy body.

    2006-05-15 00:15:21 補充:

    Besides that, having enough sleep is also essential to our well being. Health is by far more important than time, money, fame and so on. It should be placed as the top priority throughout our life.

    2006-05-15 00:17:00 補充:

    最後一段在下面意見不好意思 超過兩千字了

    2006-05-15 00:17:11 補充:

    Most people do not realize the importance of health until losing it. Therefore we should not be like “most people,” but monitoring our bodies all the time.

    2006-05-15 17:45:49 補充:

    天涯之星

    我沒說我的比你好

    也沒說你的差

    我有"踩在別人頭上,只有自己比較好"這種狀況嗎? 我批評了嗎?

    請問你有看到我說的"天涯之星 寫的很不錯"這一句嗎?

    是的 您有些用字較高深

    不過我認為或許怪怪的

    你的認同跟我的不同 就這麼簡單

    如果改你的文章而冒犯了你 先說聲抱歉

    這取決與否在於發問者

    我上來貼東西試抱著希望可以幫人的心態

    我一切是抱著平和的心態寫的

    所以你也就別動怒啦!

    參考資料: 我駐美
    • Commenter avatar登入以對解答發表意見
還有問題?馬上發問,尋求解答。