? 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 1 0 年前

想請人幫忙修改我的英文作文

  Today is New Year’s Eve, many kinfolk were come from Taiwan, We ate a family reunion dinner together.

  The dishes were abounding, beautiful and good to eat. Kids were sat together, we right away ceaselessly, unless aunt ask we to eat across from chat and until intermission.

  Later, uncle along with us to give or stage a fireworks display. The firework was shoot in air is beautiful, is like spring blow flower.

  We make a wish under the sky, I hope we all can together at New Year next year.

這是第二篇了,很感謝上次幫我修改的人:)

這篇希望能夠幫我檢查單字漢文法的錯誤

若能夠把一些句子變的比較有深度會更好

新年快樂

已更新項目:

Happy New Year 是這篇文章的題目

2 個解答

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  • ?
    Lv 4
    1 0 年前
    最佳解答

    ※Today is New Year’Eve, many kinfolk were come from Taiwan, We ate a family reunion dinner together.

    Today is….後面卻接many kinfolk were這樣時態不一致,最好都改成過去式。Kinfolk=kin,但Kinfolk比較少見到,還有were come from Taiwan這句文法也不需要were直接come from Taiwan就好了。而且好像你親戚是從台灣到大陸去團圓的樣子也和後面的連貫性很弱,你應該也是在台灣團圓的所以從哪裡來不是重點,而是重點是〝大家都回來吃團圓飯〞。

    修改後:On Chinese New Year’s Eve, all our kin gathered together to eat reunion dinner, the dishes were abounding and delicious.(在除夕夜,我們家全部的親戚都回來吃團圓飯,菜色既豐盛且好吃)

    ※The dishes were abounding, beautiful and good to eat.

    這一段前面是說年夜飯很豐盛、好吃,和後面有點不相干所以我把前面那一段年夜飯的拉到上面去了,beautiful and good to eat形容食物用beautiful好像怪怪的good to eat改成delicious較精簡。

    ※Kids were sat together, we right away ceaselessly, unless aunt ask we to eat across from chat and until intermission.

    這一段很不知所云= =",問題很多像Kids were sat together孩子被坐在一起,不用被動式,we right away ceaselessly裡面又沒動詞至少要加were但翻譯起來『我們立刻不停地』也有問題,unless aunt ask we to eat across from chat and until intermission.除非姑姑要求我們去吃在對面閒談直到休息時段,真是無法翻譯…..而起文法有很大的問題。你必須給我詳細的中文或再用英文重寫。我才可以幫你修改。

    ※Later, uncle along with us to give or stage a fireworks display. The firework was shoot in air is beautiful, is like spring blow flower.

    along with us前面要有動詞was,give or stage a fireworks display你要說放煙火吧用set off fireworks,而且煙火你用複數前面就不用冠詞a了,前面已經放煙火了後面又煙火被射向天空就有點多餘了可以不用,後面is like spring blow flower文法有問題,句子沒主詞而且like(像)是介係詞後面不接句子,而且spring blow flower春吹花這有點無理頭喔~”~,你是想說像開花一樣吧。

    修改後:Later, uncle was along with us to set off fireworks. It was so beautiful like flowers blooming.(bloom=花盛開的動詞,用ing表示他的現在的狀態,不懂我在說啥沒關係你才高一而已)

    ※We make a wish under the sky,I hope we all can together at New Year next year

    時態問題,應該是made a wish,而且是我們(we)在許願,願望不只一個而且也不一樣所以wish改成wishes再加上individually(個別地)這樣感覺比較好,at New Year next year在明年新年不能用at直接接next Chinese New Year’s Eve,這樣和前後呼應就算是個不錯的結尾了。

    修改後: We made wishes individually under the sky,I hope we all can together next Chinese New Year’s Eve

    你文章的問題和上一篇一樣,文章的連貫性弱也有許多中文是英文和許多不知所云的。

    有什麼問題就再提吧!我有空就幫你改。

    2007-02-22 00:31:57 補充:

    你寄給我的信我看到了 我也回覆了喔!

    參考資料: 自己
  • 1 0 年前

    第一句亂碼了看不懂 = =

    There are many relatives come from Taiwan,and we have a family dinner party. The dishes are very abounding and delicious.

    接下來這依據時在看不懂你想說的是什麼 = =

    這句子裡沒有動辭喔!這是不對的文法

    還有你的right away 應該要放在句尾

    uncle "is" along with us 才對(一樣的毛病..沒有動詞的句子是不完整的喔)

    "it"is like 要有主詞 = =

    next year 就可以了

    或是 next new year

    我的建議是

    要不要把你的中文拿出來 否則 您的鉅子真的完全 文法不通 ...

    後面我也很難幫上忙了 (因為看不懂= =)

    一各句子的結構

    最基本的是

    主詞 動詞

    還有

    主詞 動詞 受詞

    還有在受詞後面加上 形容詞

    .........很多的句型

    2007-02-20 05:24:51 補充:

    uncle "is" along with us 才對(一樣的毛病..沒有動詞的句子是不完整的喔)

    my uncle is starting to have a firework show with us

    "it"is like 要有主詞 = = => it is like 要有主詞

    參考資料: 英文系的偶
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