請教英文達人有關英文自傳問題(有撰寫過英文自傳者佳)..
嗯嗯！就是...我之前有寫過一篇英文自傳
但是，經過老師的評改後，他認為我的自傳似乎不是那麼理想
他覺得我只是把東西放在一起！
但是我想了又想，實在不知道該怎麼下手
我又看了一下英文老師給的範例，試想寫這樣真的與我欲闡述的風個不搭，而且很沒特色！
所以想請 英文達人/有寫過英文自傳 的朋友，幫我看一下我的自傳
提供我一些意見！謝謝！
My Chinese name is XXX, and my English name is XXX. I was born on October@, 19@@, in Pingtung. I am a considerate and thoughtful girl, always dealing with things with studious attitude. So my abilities and efforts were both approved. In my high school years, my grades were always amazing. Besides, I have ever joined the English contest of Diplomacy with my partners and won an award.
Through my family’s influence, I know my own life targets. I have a happy family and I love my family members. My parents are kind and patient, and they gave me good education so that now I am more understanding than others of the same age. To raise their children, my parents have worked so hard and always went gone home late. Since I was young, I have seen their efforts and decided to realize my ambition to give them a better life. I am really thankful for their upbringing.
English plays the most important part in my school life. I have been exposed to English since my fifth year in elementary school. I was attracted by those magical words on the blackboard. It was so interesting. Then I found I have already fallen in love with English. With the passion for English, I volunteered to be an English teacher throughout my junior high school years and I joined most English contests, too. Although I couldn’t get good grades in every contest, I was always willing to learn something from the failures.
(因為字數限制..剩下兩段貼在補充..)
In senior high school years, English became more and more difficult. At first, I couldn’t get used to it. But afterwards, I found my classmates keep finding their own ways to learn. It really inspired me.
Then to find out the proper way, I have tried again and again, and finally my English improved indeed. That made me understand: Constant dripping wears away the stone. .
Therefore, until now, I still keep searching for learning materials to make my English better, such as, English movies, English websites, Discovery, BBC, NPR, and so on. Of course, on meeting difficulties, I would immediately ask my classmates or teachers.
In the future, I want to be a writer, translator, or an employee in a foreigntrading company since I am very interested in English and I want to run deep into this field.
So I will develop my ability and tell myself must pass high level of GEPT, TOEFL, and TOEIC tests before I graduate from college. Also, I will go abroad to study and practice translating several novels.
I consider it important to choose what I am really interested in so that I wouldn’t get tired of my jobs years later.
自傳到這邊完了..
補充1-3段 是 "倒數第二段"
補充4-最後 是 "最後一段"
4 個解答
- superkonaLv 71 0 年前最佳解答
關於自傳的問題你可以去下面那個部落格看看或是發問，它格上有滿多相關的文章，對你應該有幫助。或許以也可以請板主幫你校對看看你的自傳順不順口囉！
參考資料： 網路上 - ?Lv 51 0 年前
不是很確定你這個自傳的目的是什麼,像是要說明為什麼會對英文有興趣跟為什麼要學英文,如果是的話
文法部份就不多做說明,問題太多
看完之後,覺得你的問題是寫的太淺了,深度不夠,還有你很多地方寫了很多的多餘的東西,感覺不知道你想表示的是什麼,有點類似天外飛來一筆的感覺,你每個段落讓我覺得接不起來的感覺,東跳一個西跳一個,我覺得這是最大的問題
你老師說的沒錯,的確是把一些東西放在一起而已
- 1 0 年前
妳的自傳是要用在哪方面的呢？
如果是單純自我介紹用的（比方說課堂上或者是甄試用），
內容的話我是覺得還ＯＫ，
第一段開頭的地方可以只說英文名字就好了。
通常來說，自傳大概三到四段左右就可以了，
你可以先整理一下各段落想表達的內容（說重點）。
我會比較建議你
第一段：把"My name..."跟"Through my..."這兩段整理成一段，大約是用四到五句來表達說明，
第二段："English plays...."這段也是要整理成三到四句。
第三段："In senion.."+"Then to..."+Therefore,."這三個部分整理成四到五句。
第四段："In the future,.."+"So I..."+"I consider..."這三個部分也是整理成四到五句。
希望可以幫上妳的忙喔～加油～
參考資料： 曾經也是寫英文自傳寫到想尖叫的我
