麗玲 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 1 0 年前

請幫忙修改英文作文,謝謝

An accident happened

It was a trip to Hisinchu city, but it happened an accident.Jenny and I

took a 2-day trip to Hisinchu city.The first day was fine, including the weather, the scenery and the meal.Every thing was fine till we had

finished dinner and rested in the hotel.We went out to see stars after

took shower and rested for a while.The stars are very bright, but we

want to know the star's name.Jenny called her friend who is

acquainted with astronomy. He told us the star's name on the cell

phone .Jenny raised her head to look for the star and talked on cell

phone.Suddenly she fell into the gutter. I held her to get up. She felt

large pain, I ask for help by the hotel's attendant. He immediately

decided to deliver us to go to the hospital for emergency treatment

than call 119.Because the hotel is in the mountain, it is sooner than

call the ambulance. It took 20 minutes, we went to the hotel. Jenny

felt painful; The doctor injected her to relieve paint and hooted x-ray. The doctor found her wrist's bone had broken. He fixed her wrist by

gypsum and gave some medicine. Then we backed to hotel to rest,

The next day morning my friend picks us up back to Taipei, then we

went to the National Taiwan University Hospital, the doctor suggested it would be better to operate the wrist. Jenny decided to take

operation. We went to temple to pray for the potation well done.

Luckily it took 20 minutes to operate, and Jenny took a rear for one

hour then she can back home.Jenny has been resting at home for her

wrist's health.She find her right hand is important ,like taking

something, wearing clothes, taking shower ,eating, writing, everything

are very trouble.I would say that was unlocking for her,

but I hope that she will get well in a short time.

2 個解答

評分
  • 1 0 年前
    最佳解答

    幫你改好了!

    花了不少時間

    你的文章有很多Chinese English,有些我看不懂你要表達的地方,我就依上下文幫你改。

    你再看看可不可以。

    Bye!

    PS. 因為字數太多,分幾次貼。

    An accident

    It should have been a nice trip. Unfortunately, an accident happened.

    (should have + pp 表 原本應該是…,但後來卻不是)

    Jenny and I took a 2-day trip to Hisinchu city. The weather was fine. The scenery and meals were nice. Everything was so good.

    In the evening, we had dinner and took a shower in the hotel.

    After taking a short break, we decided to go out to see stars in the sky.

    The stars were very bright, and we wanted to know the name of the stars.

    Jenny called her friend who is good at astronomy.

    He tried to tell us the names on the phone.

    While talking on the phone, Jenny raised her head to look for the stars.

    Suddenly, she fell into the gutter.

    I was in a hurry and tried to save her.

    She felt extremely painful, and I asked the hotel attendant for help right away.

    He called 119 for help and asked them to take us to the hospital immediately.

    Because the hotel was in the mountain, we had to waited for a while.

    It took us 20 minutes to go from the hotel to the hospital.

    2008-06-12 13:30:57 補充:

    Jenny felt painful.

    The doctor first gave her a shot to relieve the pain.

    The doctor x-rayed her and found her wrist bone broken.

    He then applied gypsum to her wrist, and gave her some medicine.

    → apply 藥 to 患部

    2008-06-12 13:31:40 補充:

    Then we went back to the hotel in which we spent one night there.

    The next day, my friend picked us up in the morning, and then we went back to Taipei.

    2008-06-12 13:31:49 補充:

    We went to the National Taiwan University Hospital to see the doctoe again.

    The doctor suggested it would be better to undergo an operation.

    Jenny accepted the doctor’s suggestion and decided to undergo an operation.

    2008-06-12 13:32:08 補充:

    We went to the temple and prayed to God’s for help. → 請求神佑

    Luckily, it took her 20 minutes to undergo the operation.

    After the operation, she took a rest for one hour, and then she could back home.

    2008-06-12 13:32:21 補充:

    It took a little time to take the rehabilitation treatment, so she had to stay at home and rest.

    She found that health was really important.

    Without her right hand, it would be troublesome to do things such as taking things, wearing clothes, taking a shower, eating, and writing.

    2008-06-12 13:32:25 補充:

    She was unlucky.

    But I hoped that she would get well in a short time.

    參考資料: 自己
  • 1 0 年前

    An accident happen

    It was a trip to Hisinchu city, but it happened an accident.Jenny and I

    took a 2-day trip to Hisinchu city.The first day was fine, including the weather, the scenery and the meal.Every thing was fine till we had

    finished dinner and rested in the hotel.We went out to see stars after

    took shower and rested for a while.The stars are very bright, but we

    want to know the star's name.Jenny called her friend who is

    acquainted with astronomy. He told us the star's name on the cell

    phone .Jenny raised her head to look for the star and talked on cell

    phone.Suddenly she fell into the gutter. I held her to get up. She felt

    large pain, I ask for help by the hotel's attendant. He immediately

    decided to deliver us to go to the hospital for emergency treatment

    than call 119.Because the hotel is in the mountain, it is sooner than

    call the ambulance. It took 20 minutes, we went to the hotel. Jenny

    felt painful; The doctor injected her to relieve paint and hooted x-ray. The doctor found her wrist's bone had broken. He fixed her wrist by

    gypsum and gave some medicine. Then we backed to hotel to rest,

    The next day morning my friend picks us up back to Taipei, then we

    went to the National Taiwan University Hospital, the doctor suggested it would be better to operate the wrist. Jenny decided to take

    operation. We went to temple to pray for the potation well done.

    Luckily it took 20 minutes to operate, and Jenny took a rear for one

    hour then she can back home.Jenny has been resting at home for her

    wrist's health.She find her right hand is important ,like taking

    something, wearing clothes, taking shower ,eating, writing, everythingg.

    are very trouble.I would say that was unlocking for her,

    but I hope that she will get well in a short time.

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