匿名使用者
匿名使用者 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 1 0 年前

幫我改作文(zoo)20點

Zoo is a good place for everyone to see the animals around the world. Because every country around the world has more than one zoo, people don't have to go abroad to see the unique animals. Becides, zoo coule educate children what they couldn't learn at school. It is a positive and funny place. However, some people think those animals in the zoo are unhappy, because they couldn't live their home country and go everywhere. It is not follow nature law.

IN my opinion, I think zoo is positive for us. Although there are a lot of negative, we con improve it as possible as we can. Ithink every country should have a zoo, but it doesn't need morethan two zoos.

some people think those animals in the zoo are unhappy, because they couldn't live their home country and go everywhere. those animals in the zoo are unhappy, because they couldn't live their home country and go everywhere.

這句話的文法好像怪怪的

因為從 some people think 後面的子句 再加一個逗號 可以用because連接詞連起來嗎?

換句話說,如果少了some people think 這樣就可以變成一個完整的句子,可是因為多了它,已經從主要子句便成子句了。

其實我不只想各位幫我檢查那個句子,是希望能幫我整篇文章找錯誤

謝謝嚕!!

1 個解答

評分
  • 1 0 年前
    最佳解答

    Zoo is a good place for everyone to see the animals around the world. Because countries around the world have more than one zoo, people don't have to go abroad to see the unique animals. Becides, the zoos not only educate children what they can't learn at school but also help them to get more knowledge about the animals. The zoo is a positive and funny place. However, some people think those animals in the zoo are unhappy because they can't live their home country and can't go anywhere they like. It can't follow the law of nature. In my opinion, I think the zoo is helpful to us. Although, there are a lot of negations about the freedom of animals, we still try to improve those discussions as possible as we can. I think countries should have the zoo, but it doesn't need more than two zoos.

    首先,先說抱歉,我有做部分修改,這是以你ㄉ文章來用我ㄉ方式,不是絕對,但我覺得內容可以在多寫些東西,你可以作為參考。

    其實老師要的並不是艱深的句子,有時候指要有內容,即使用簡單的單字組合就可以了。

    通常寫文章,要先有Title,之後要有主要ㄉMain idea,再來是Baby內容(一定環繞在你的title主題上唷) 再後則要有一個conclusion結尾來呼應你的開頭唷。

    結尾部分還是有力一點會比較好。畢竟從這ㄍ論點來說,一個國家只有一個動物園ㄉ話,是要在哪??

    中心? 偏遠?

    那國家土地大小該怎ㄇ辦??

    P.S 從 some people think 後面的子句 再加一個逗號 可以用because連接詞連起來嗎?

    這ㄍ是不能加逗號的, 當Because 放在句首才可以加逗號

    例:

    Because I was ill, I was absent yesterday.

    前面是從屬子句,後面是主要子句。

    如果對調,那麼主要子句在前面,後面的because從屬子句只是要補充說明原因,這時候是不需要加逗號ㄉ。

    希望對你還是有些幫助。

    2008-10-01 15:43:30 補充:

    這裡補充我用來寫英文作文的....方法還是公式給你參考好了~!

    Title

    再來說明主題的重點句或想法或開頭大綱

    接下用幾點來證明或支持自己的論點,這時候你可以使用

    First, Second,Next,

    Then,After that....這些都很好用喔,而且就能很清楚歸納你所要表達的內容)

    最後是一個結論(呼應你的主題,作為一個結束)

    At last,Finally,

    2008-10-01 15:50:55 補充:

    有時候能清楚有條理的敘訴你的內容,比起文法上的錯誤還來的好,誰叫我們還是學生呢??讓老師改正我們文法上的使用錯誤是必然的,重點是要讓老師清楚我們到底是在寫些什ㄇ東西? 最怕的就是文法不通,又沒內容,老師有看沒懂,加油吧~!!

    希望這些建議對你有些幫助~!

    參考資料: 自己, 自己, 自己
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