匿名使用者
匿名使用者 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 10 年前

請英文高手幫我校正文法錯誤

這是我申請交換學生的文件,Q是文件上的題目,A是我回答的內容,若有文法上的錯誤或詞不達意甚至不知所云,請各位高手指點!

Q: Why do you think you will be asuccessful exchange student? What can you tell us about yourself, yourpersonality or your habits that will help us match you with a host family?A: Because I have lots of enthusiasm andambition in learning, include learning new culture, new customs, new manners,new language, and studies. And I will do my best to be a successful exchangestudent. I am a calm person. I love reading, listening to the music, andwatching paintings. Q: What are your favorite activities and why?A: My favorite activity is taking a walk.Because when you are doing it, you feel that the air refreshes your heart, andyou can watch the scenery along the streets and paths; Then you will think “Whata wonderful world!”Q: Describe something you have done thatyou are proud of or something special about yourself? A: I am good at writing, I often win theprize in writing contest. And I love designing, I often deserve praise from theteachers.Q: What do you want to do after you finishyour education? How do you think your exchange experience help you in thefuture?A: I want to be a designer or a writer, Ithink the experience will change my values, change my view of life, and give mesome inspiration.Q: What is your favorite family tradition?A: Our family has a yearly reunion on NewYear’s Eve.Q: What do you think you will miss mostduring your exchange year? How do you think you will react if you get homesick?A: I will write letters about my sorrow andhappiness, my homesickness and growth, and send them to my parents and myfriends in Taiwan.Also, I can write poems about my life in Germanyand my admiration of Germany,making my homesickness into beautiful poetry.

已更新項目:

Q: Have you been away from your family for more a few days? If yes, please indicate for how long and how it affected you.

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A: Except on holidays, I didn’t live with my family because my school isn’t near my home. I rented a room near the school, so I need to get along with the landlady, I need to learn how to use the public things and sharing spaces sparingly.

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I have been independent since I was a child, so even I left my home, I still feel no sorrow.

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Q: How will your parents react to your spending a year abroad? Do they support your decision?

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A: I can still recall the first time I told my parents that I want to study abroad, they kept in silence for a long time and had lots of doubts, but after I persuaded them to realize that how important this decision was, they have supported me till now.

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Q: How do you and your family spend your time? Briefly describe each member of your family and tell how you spend your time together, both weekdays and weekends.

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A: Besides me, there are three members in my family: my father, my mother, and my sister. My father is an engineer, he is usually busy on business, and he is a golf-lover.

My mother is a shopkeeper, and she is also a good housewife.

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My sister is a happy senior high school student, she is good at make-up. I cannot get together with my family on weekdays, but we sometimes have dinner together on weekends’ night.

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以上,內容繁雜,真是麻煩各位了!

2 個解答

評分
  • 10 年前
    最佳解答

    Like most Chinese writers, you need to have the patience to look over what you wrote and correct grammatical errors, such as tense, single/plural, or gender.

    include learning new culture,

    including learning new culture,

    streets and paths; Then you will think “Whata wonderful world!”

    when you use a semicolon, [;], the next sentence start with lower case, not upper case word.

    I often deserve praise from the teachers.

    'deserve' something is not necessarily winning something. I think you want to say -- I often won praises from teachers, deservedly, I humbly believe.

    give me some inspiration.

    The 'some' here is typically Chinese English. We would actually say .. give me inspiration. Since 一些 is so prevalent in Chinese, it is very common to find 'some' in Chinese English.

    Also, I can write poems about my life in Germany

    "I can" is too hard .. Most people would soften it by saying .. Also, I would like to write poems ..

    I need to get along with the land lady ..

    If you read back and check, you will revise to 'I needed' .. this is the diligence I was constantly talking about ..

    I have been independent since I was a child

    Too hard ... I have been quite independent since .. you will learn better as you use English more and more ..

    I told my parents that I want to study abroad --- wanted. Again, lazy .. lazy ..

    on weekends’ night -- on weekends' evenings .. Most Chinese could not get used to the difference between evening and night .. since we have no such distinction in our own language.

  • 10 年前

    (X) including learning new culture (insert article or use plural noun) (O) Also, I can write poems about my life in Germany

    ("would like to" twists the message to be conveyed) (O) I have been independent since I was a child (Fine as it is) If you really want to "soften it up", use wordslike "fairly", "rather", or "somewhat". (X) Most Chinese could not get used to the difference Unless you are talking about an ethnic group, such as"The Chinese", words with the -ese suffix can only be used asadjectives, whereas words with the -an suffix can be used as both nouns and adjectives.

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