Kelly 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 9 年前

英文小寫作,幫改囉.. 3Q

寫的作文,可幫改文法的問題~`

3 Q

1 sOne Friday afternoon, Hannah got a call while she was doing the housework. “Mommy, help me!” said a man like her son. Hannah was so anxious and nervous that she followed the directions to go to the ATM to transfer her deposit for resercuing her son. Fortunately, when she went home, she met her son.” Were you Okay, my baby?” Said Hannah. Her son didn’t know what her mother talked about at all. Her mother described what happened today. How worried she was! Finally,they knew they were lied by 詐騙 group and made a phone call to the police. Be cautious and calm down while getting any calls that claim your son or daughter.

已更新項目:

請問在看圖描述故事時,本段中的"What has happened today"

可以用過去完成式 What had happened today? 嗎......

為什麼要用現在完成式來寫呢.

3Q

2 個解答

評分
  • ?
    Lv 6
    9 年前
    最佳解答

    One Friday afternoon, while Hannah was doing

    housewrok, she got a call from a stranger demanding a

    sum of ransom and then heard a tearful voice, "Mommy,

    help me!" said a child,whose voice is like her son.

    Hannah was so nervous ,and very anxious about her

    son's safety. For rescueing her son, she followed the

    caller's instruction to transfer the said sum to the

    assigned account by ATM.

    Fortunately, when she reached home, her son had

    already come back. "Were you Okay, my baby!" asked

    Hannah. Her son didn't know what his mother was talking

    about at all. Therefore, he said to his mother, "What has

    happened?" His mother described the case happened

    this afternoon. Eventually, they knew that the money had

    been cheated by a scam gang, and reported this case to

    the police.

    Be cautious, and Calm down when getting any call from a

    stranger pretending to be a kidnapper of your child!

    2011-12-05 11:05:44 補充:

    "Were you Okay, my baby!" -------> "Are you okay, my baby!"

    2011-12-05 22:15:40 補充:

    My comments :

    (1) There are some mistakes in your essay.

    (2) Some sentences are grammatically incorrect,for example, " Mommy, help me!" said a man like her son, Hannah was so anxious...the directions ... , "Were you okay, my baby?" and Her son didn't know what her mother...

    2011-12-05 22:16:47 補充:

    (3) Your essay needs structure.

  • 9 年前

    One Friday afternoon, Hannah got a call while she was doing the housework. “Mommy, help me!” said by a man sounded like her son. Hannah was so anxious and nervous that she followed the instruction and go to the ATM to transfer money in order to rescue her son. Fortunately, when she went home, she saw her son.” Were you Okay, my baby?” Said Hannah. Her son didn’t know what her mother was talking about at all. Then she described what has happened today. How worried she was! Finally, they knew they were lied to by a scam clan and made a phone call to the police. Be cautious and calm down while getting any call that claims that they have your son or daughter.

    remark:

    I change "direction" to "instruction", I think it is better, because "direction" usually uses with give the direction to go somewhere.

    2011-12-05 10:05:37 補充:

    Since you have "today" at the end of the sentence, so it is better to use "has happened".

    2011-12-05 10:05:48 補充:

    Also, based upon the way you describe the story, you have placed your time reference point at the end of the day. It is not that far away from "what has happened". Therefore, in my opinion, "has happened" is better.

    2011-12-05 10:06:55 補充:

    However, if you place your time reference point, say 10 days later, then YES, you can use "had happened" but replace "today" with "that day".

    參考資料: self
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