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匿名使用者 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 8 年前

幫我改正英文 文章,錯誤的地方

  Hello everyone, I am XXX, nineteen years old. I live in Banciao, Near Nanya Night Market, There are a lot of things in the night market! Which is my favorite is “Milk Bottle” Popcorn. I grow in a warm family, There are four members in my family, Father, mother, elder sister and me. My father is a plumbing and electrical engineer, he is work so hard. My mother is a barber, She is a gracious mother. My elder sister is boarders in Chungli, she is smart but lazy. I have a parrot at home, It is very cute and obedient, Whenever we are having our fruit, It always shout: “Hello 你好.”

  Chocolate is my favorite food. when I felt bored, I play sudoku. My hobby is listening to music and reading the novel. listening to music makes me relax. I immerse myself in novels, it makes me forget about everything unhappy. I am good at computer mechanical drawing. I want to learn how to playing the piano.

  I graduated from Drafting Department of Hai-san Industrial Vocational high school. I am studying in Chihlee Institute of Technology, major in Commerce Technology and Management. I like this school because everyone is friendly. I wish I could become a Sales Engineer in the future. Thanks for listening.

3 個解答

評分
  • 8 年前
    最佳解答

    版大您好,Happy New Year!

    也容Panda try try ㄅ;我會在保留您的語氣下修改文法,請放心。

    粗體底線為修改過的字,如下:

    Hello everyone, my name is XXX, and I am nineteen years old. I live in Banciao, near the Nanya Night Market. There are a lot of food in the night market, with my favorite being the "Milk Bottle” Popcorn. (幫您將thing改成food, 因為前者包括夜市任何東西,例如衣服及包包,而這些不能吃的東西是不可跟popcorn這種可吃的東西比)I grew up in a warm family of four: father, mother, elder sister and me.(寫作時盡量精簡,如果能用越少字去形容同樣的事越好) My father is a plumbing and electrical engineer who works hard. My mother is a barber and also gracious. My elder sister lives in Chungli, and is smart but lazy. (我稍微幫您做了些修改,這樣你就可以用最精簡的方式來介紹家人) I have a parrot at home; it is very cute and obedient. Whenever we are having our fruit, it always shouts: “Hello 你好.”

    Chocolate is my favorite sweets. (幫您將food改成sweets甜食,原因同上,food包括甜鹹酸苦,你也不可能把巧克力當作最愛的食物)When I feel bored, I play sudoku. My hobbies are listening to music and reading the novel.(你有兩樣興趣得用複數) Listening to music makes me relax. I immerse myself in novels, because it makes me forget about every bit of unpleasantness. I am good at mechanical computer drawing. I want to learn how to playing the piano.

    I graduated from Drafting Department of Hai-san Industrial Vocational high school. I am studying in Chihlee Institute of Technology, and majoring in Commerce Technology and Management. I like this school because everyone is friendly. I hope I can become a Sales Engineer in the future. (Wish 為不能實現的願望,hope為可實現,所以這裡要用hope而非wish) Thanks for listening.

    整合如下:

    寫不下,放在意見欄 = - =

    2013-01-01 08:10:55 補充:

    Hello everyone, my name is XXX, and I am nineteen years old. I live in Banciao, near the Nanya Night Market. There are a lot of food in the night market, with my favorite being the "Milk Bottle” Popcorn. I grew up in a warm family of four: father, mother, elder sister and me.

    2013-01-01 08:11:24 補充:

    My father is a plumbing and electrical engineer who works hard. My mother is a barber and also gracious. My elder sister lives in Chungli, and is smart but lazy. I have a parrot at home; it is very cute and obedient. Whenever we are having our fruit, it always shouts: “Hello 你好.”

    2013-01-01 08:12:07 補充:

    Chocolate is my favorite sweets. When I feel bored, I play sudoku. My hobbies are listening to music and reading the novel. Listening to music makes me relax. I immerse myself in novels, because it makes me forget about every bit of unpleasantness. I am good at mechanical computer drawing.

    2013-01-01 08:12:48 補充:

    I want to learn how to playing the piano.

    I graduated from Drafting Department of Hai-san Industrial Vocational high school. I am studying in Chihlee Institute of Technology, and majoring in Commerce Technology and Management.

    2013-01-01 08:13:41 補充:

    I like this school because everyone is friendly. I hope I can become a Sales Engineer in the future. Thanks for listening.

    2013-01-01 08:14:10 補充:

    你已有相當的英文底子,但一定要注意小細節。

    學英文除了背單字記文法,最重要的是要有思考邏輯。

    Hope it helps!

    2013-01-01 08:54:24 補充:

    後來覺得女生用hair stylist比barber貼切,不知為何barber讓我想到幫男性修鬍子剪頭髮的老阿伯 = - =

    2013-01-01 09:07:39 補充:

    哈漏掉一個mistake = - =

    請將第4欄的 "I want to learn how to playing the piano"改成

    "I want to learn to play the piano"

    2013-01-01 09:35:22 補充:

    我是一隻careless panda...

    請將第4欄改成"I am studying (at) Chihlee Institute of Technology.

    2013-01-01 11:08:11 補充:

    我已改過了...I want to learn to play the piano 比較好

    2013-01-01 11:12:51 補充:

    寫作時越精簡越好...

    2013-01-01 13:15:00 補充:

    I want to learn how to play the piano

    我想學習如何彈鋼琴。

    I want to learn to play the piano

    我想學習彈鋼琴。

    參考資料: Eat, drink, and sleep English
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  • 8 年前

    應該是I want to learn how to play the piano吧

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  • 8 年前

    Hello everyone, my name is XXX, and I am nineteen years old. I live in Banciao, and my home is near by Nanya Night Market. There are a lot of things in the night market! Which my favorite is “Milk Bottle” Popcorn. I grow in a warm family, There are four members in my family, Father, Mother, elder Sister and me. My father is a plumber , he works so hard. My mother is a barber. She is a gracious mother. My elder sister is a boarder in Chungli, she is smart but lazy. I have a parrot at home. It is very cute and obedient. Whenever we are having our fruit, It always shout: “Hello 你好.”

      Chocolate is my favorite food. When I felt bored, I use to play sudoku. My hobby is listening to music and reading novels. Listening to music makes me relax. I immerse myself in novels, it makes me forget about everything unhappy. I am good at computer mechanical drawing. I want to learn how to playing the piano.

    改的地方不多 稍微看一下吧^^

    *要注意大小寫

    *少用逗號多用句號

    *盡量少用中文是思考

    參考資料: 我我我我我
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