Demonic 發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 7 年前

英文自傳文法求批改

以下是我的英文自傳內容

請各位針對文法錯誤部分不吝賜教

感激不盡

My name is OOO. I am the second child of my family, and have two brothers to accompany me. Both of my parents are very kindliness persons, but they have a very hard standard on our character.

I graduated from OOOO in this year. In the study of my department I learned a lot, not only about the public administration, but also about the business administration knowledge, such as HR Management, Strategic Planning, and Marketing Management. In the course, make a report is my favorite. Because I can learn more additional knowledge through searching Information of every report, it really benefited me a lot.

I have been Scout cadres in my high school life. Through the period, I learned about how to planning and leading activities. This experience also let me understand the importance of teamwork. In my third year of college, I have been practical training at Legal Aid Foundation. By listening to each person's case make me know the importance of empathy. Maybe I couldn’t help them in any way, but sometimes they just need someone to listening what they have suffered, and derive consolation from a listen sincere heart. My part-time job in vacation was packaging fish. Although it was a little hard for a long time labor, but in this job let me know how to finished work in limited time. Efficient working built on the basis of every aspect closely linked.

Now I’m ready to access career and contribution of what I learned. I hope to have a work of a large number of learning opportunities, and keep myself continuous progress in the course of work for enhancing my competitiveness. Please give me a chance to performance my capability. I will do my best in every way.

3 個解答

評分
  • 7 年前
    最佳解答

    My name is OOO. I am the second child {of} (in) my family, and have two brothers to accompany me. Both of my parents are very {kindliness} (kindly 用形容詞) persons, but they {have a very hard standard on our character.} (不太懂這句話的意思,如果是要表達父母對自己要求嚴格的話: have high expectations on us)

    I graduated from OOOO {in} (可省略) this year. In the study of my department, (r加,) I learned a lot, not only about the public administration, but also about the business administration knowledge, such as HR Management, Strategic Planning, and Marketing Management. In the course, {make} (making) a report is my favorite. Because I can learn more additional knowledge through searching Information of every report, it really{ benefited} (benefits 因為前面皆為現在式,所以後面也用現在式) me a lot.

    {I have been Scout cadres in my high school life.} (因為是擔任幹部,如果是我會說: I served as a Scout cadres~) Through the period, I learned about how to {planning} (how to 後面加原型動詞: plan) and{ leading} (lead) activities. This experience also let me understand the importance of teamwork. In my third year of college, I {have been practical training} (可以改成interned或 I have a practical training) at Legal Aid Foundation. By listening to each person's case make me know the importance of empathy. Maybe I couldn’ t help them in any way, but sometimes they just need someone to{ listening} (listen to用原型) what they have suffered, and derive consolation from{ a listen sincere heart}. (不太懂: a listener) My part-time job in vacation was packaging fish. Although it was a little hard for a long time labor, but in this job let me know how to{ finished} (finish) work in limited time. Efficient working built on the basis of every aspect closely linked.

    2013-07-18 22:48:56 補充:

    從hope到competitiveness(我會改成I hope to have a job which has a large number of learning opportunities to keep me progressing and enhance my competitiveness)

    • Commenter avatar登入以對解答發表意見
  • 7 年前

    Thank you so much!

    • Commenter avatar登入以對解答發表意見
  • 7 年前

    There are quite a number of mistakes here, unfortunately I have no time to point out individually. First sentence:

    “I am the second child in my family.”

    “I have two younger brothers.”

    “My parents are kind of traditional and benevolent people, who set a high standard for our mentality and morality.”

    2013-07-16 00:54:45 補充:

    Second sentence: EXAMPLE

    "I graduated from the public administration faculty of the XXX University this year, with a major in xxx and minor in xxx, xxx, and xxxx."

    2013-07-16 00:55:37 補充:

    “During my course of study, I found that conducting research, making analysis and presenting the report before my classmates is a great satisfaction because I can utilize my xxx and xxx skills learned through the process.”

    • Commenter avatar登入以對解答發表意見
還有問題?馬上發問,尋求解答。