發問時間: 社會與文化語言 · 5 年前

急!!!跪求英語高手幫我改英文作文 20點!!!!!!!!

跪求英語高手幫我看這ㄧ篇作文,【單字、文法、句子】上有錯誤幫我挑出並改正,拜託!!!!><

或其他認為可以替換別的單字或句子,也能告訴我 謝謝!!!

Some teachers also claim that students cannot use

cell phones in class because they oppose students to use cell phones to take pictures about class content. One reason is that this custom will make students lazy, and they will think there is no need to waste time copying notes. The other reason is to worry about the intellectual of property rights. However, nowadays, more and more teachers tend to use PowerPoints instead of traditional writing. If the teaching speed is too quick, students cannot take notes in time. What’s more, another bad effect is that if students are busy taking notes in class, they will not listen to the teacher carefully. So they cannot hear what the teacher stresses. Therefore, using a cell phone to take photos of teaching content is feasible, so that students would not be too late to takes notes and can be more focused on what teachers teach. As for the right of property, I don’t think it is important when students take good care of photos from spreading them out.

Another reason for rejection from opponents is students might cheat using their cell phones during tests. Cell phones nowadays all have access to the Internet, so the students might send answers to other students or groups when the teacher is unaware. Thus, cell phone should be prohibited with students. But this argument is not well supported. Students cheated with their cellphone because teachers didn't pay much attentions. If the teacher can be more diligent and walk around the classroom, this won't happen. When a particular student is cheating with his or her cellphone, punishments should be towards the person only. So it is unfair to restrict the cellphone usage of all students when partial students violate the rules.

5 個解答

評分
  • 5 年前
    最佳解答

    我的在下面

    我就直接改囉

    Some teachers are claiming that students cannot use cell phones to take pictures of class lessons. (they oppose students to use cell phones to take pictures about class content. 不通) One reason they oppose students to do so is because such custom will make students lazy. The other reason to worry about is the intellectual of property rights. Students may think that there is no need to waste time writing down notes. However, nowadays, more and more teachers tend to use PowerPoints instead of traditional writing. If the teachers teach too rapidly, students cannot take notes in such short amount of time. (What’s more) 這個不是個連接詞,Another bad effect is that if students are busy taking notes in class, they won't be able listen what the teacher is imploring because of their lack of attention. Therefore, using a cell phone to take photos of lesson is viable. Students would not be insufficient in note taking and may be focus more on what teachers teach.

    As for the right of property, in my opinion is important when students take good care of photos from spreading them out. Another reason for (rejection from opponents) 不懂這個翻譯 is students might cheat using their cell phones during tests. Modernized cell phones have access to the Internet and students might send answers to other students or groups when the teacher is unaware of. Thus, cell phone should be prohibited with students.(because.....這邊需要加句子) However, this argument is not well supported.(解釋為甚麼..這邊需要加句子) Students cheated with their cellphones because teachers aren't paying attentions. If the teacher can be more diligent and walk around the classroom, this wouldn't happen. When a particular student is cheating with his or her cellphone, punishments should be given toward the person only. Therefore it is unfair to restrict the cellphone usage of all students when partial students violate the rules. (結束的句子要加)

    我覺得你寫的很好

    有些很彆扭的地方而已

    加油加油!

    我括號的地方是要刪的

    你如果有問題可以再問我

    參考資料: 我我我
  • 您好,本來想幫您修改通順,前幾段落都修改好了,但是越讀後面越發現文章邏輯太過混亂,因此放棄修改。這邊給您一些寫作建議,之後寫的文章會越來越好喔!

    1.英文文章相當重視邏輯,文章前後敘述立場要一致,且要有發展順序,不可好壞同時敘述。例如:手機受爭議(為什麼)→但是某些老師支持手機(為什麼)→課堂中手機應是可以使用的。

    或是:手機在課堂中是好的,因為A.B.C.→A原因敘述→B原因敘述→C原因敘述→手機在課堂中是好的(總結)

    2.支持手機的段落(PowerPoint那邊)應以手機的正面應用為主,不然會變成:「擦絲瓜水可以抗老喔,你看林XX每天都抹乳液皮膚超好,所以大家都應該擦絲瓜水。」這樣邏

    2015-06-09 16:52:28 補充:

    不通的句子。

    3.文章要平穩,每件事敘述的份量應平均。舉例來說,這篇文章為了平反老師擔心的”不抄筆記”其實是好事而分配了相當份量於此,但是老師擔心的”智慧財產權”只用一句話就帶過了,這樣文章會不平衡喔。

    4.論說文用來支持自己論點的句子,不可以用”我覺得”或是”我不覺得”來表示,缺乏說服力。(I don’t think it is important when students take good care of photos from spreading them out.)

  • 暖暖
    Lv 4
    5 年前

    日本英文家教札幌巨蛋,發生女球迷遭到界外球擊中右眼失明的意外,札幌地方法院26日宣判球團等相關單位必須賠償英文家教,創下日本首件球迷勝訴的案例。日媒報導,原告為一名30多歲的女性,2010年8月和丈夫及3名子女前往札幌巨蛋觀看火腿對西武的英文家教,原告一家人坐在內野看台,比賽過程中突然飛來一顆界外球,不幸擊中女球迷的臉部,造成右臉骨骨折和右眼破裂,傷勢嚴重。女球迷提出告訴,向球賽主辦者火腿隊球團及札幌巨蛋英文家教所有者札幌市府求償約4700萬日圓。經過多年纏訟,札幌地院判決女球迷勝訴。法官指出,內野看台設置的圍欄未能擋住界外球,球團方面怠於設置球網等安全措施,球場設備不足以防範危險,欠缺安全性。球團在訴訟過程中曾表示,球場內大螢幕及廣播均會提醒球迷注意,出現界外球時,場內還會鳴示警笛,已經充分採取措施,觀眾若稍加注意應可避免被球擊中英文家教,但未能說服法官,對於宣判結果,球團表示遺憾,擔心未來球場若設置過多的防護設備,將會剝奪球迷觀戰的臨場感。toefl補習班最好學的有推薦哪一家?英文家教的教學方式?有誰請過英文家教?托福補習班找哪一個比較好?請推薦多益怎麼考才會有好成績?tutorabc學習方式?我想找好一點的線上學英文程度好學嗎?有哪些建議多益高分技巧有沒有人可以分享的?學英文是不是很難啊?我想簡單學英文多益分數怎麼弄才會高分呢?托福滿分很難ㄟ,請問怎麼做到的?此案並非日本首件因「球吻」意外提起的訴訟,但卻是首件球迷勝訴案例。2008年5月樂天隊主場宮城球場也曾發生男球迷遭界外球擊中單眼失明的意外,火腿隊在千葉球場練習時也有類似意外,但法院均因同意球團主張安全措施已足夠,英文家教多益線上學英文學英文多益高分技巧多益分數托福滿分toefl補習班托福補習班tutorabc而判決球迷敗訴 這個地球被我們稱為地球村

    因為交通的發達123

    所以我們想去地球上的任何一個地方

    只需要坐著飛機幾乎都能抵達

    這樣想感覺地球似乎很小123

    但其實地球對很多人來說卻是無比的龐大這是因為語言的關係

    我們會說中文其實是非常幸運的事情

    地球上有超過十億的人口都是說中文的123

    剩下的人口可能絕大多數

    好幾十億人都是說英文的人口

    所以我們只需要把英文學好

    就可以自由自在的走遍全世界重點來了!!

    在台灣 對很多人來說

    學英文非常的困難

    因為沒有學英文的環境與有效率學英文的方法像是今天背單字只是為了應付考試

    過不到一個星期就忘記

    遇到了外國人 往往只會說sorry跟thank you所以我想跟各位推薦一個超級多人推薦

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    TutorABC在世界上非常有名

    如果你對英文有興趣想要學好

    卻沒去聽過真的非常可惜

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    (我覺得這很重要!!)如果說現在你會說很溜的英文

    以及你本來就會說的中文

    我相信不管你到哪個國家

    不管是哪一間公司

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    (所以千萬別填錯囉!! 希望聽過後可以改變你的人生) 111

  • 5 年前

    寫得真不是好.太長了我只能幫改第一句吧!

    Many teachers suggested that cell phones be banned in the classroom for the reason that the phones might deter the students' learning process if used inappropriately during the class.

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  • 5 年前

    The correction are found in enclosed words inside brackets(----)

    Only minor mistakes are found due to good work performed:-

    (1)to use (cell-phones=them) to take pictures about class (+course) content.

    (2)this custom=manner

    (3)If----(then) students cannot take notes in time.

    (4)of teaching (course) content is feasible(=?) , (=practicable, possible)

    (5)focused (attention) on

    (6)is unaware(d)

    (7)cell phone (usage) be prohibited

    (8)should be (given)

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